My Heart is Broken but I have some Glue
by Sophiacharlotte
Summary: <html><head></head>AU Caryl, starts in 2014 flashes back to 1996.. He was utterly and completely obsessed with a girl who didn't even know his name. CARYL</html>
1. Chapter 1

AN: OH god, what am i doing? I have too many works in progress. I'm a little unsure about this, so if you like let me know...I'm always more motivated when i know you guys are liking something. I'm not going to update this alot yet, Shelter is going to be wrapped up very soon, and possibly Mending Broken wings too. Once those are completed I can focus on this more. I would like to do another non AU multichapter too...but lately I have been drawing a blank on non AU unless prompted. So to explain this story the title comes from a Nirvana song (I'm a big Nirvana fan) This story starts in 2014, will flashback to 1996 for awhile then go back to 2014...few things -you know I write happy endings that`s my only guarantee. Daryl may be a little OOC in some places. It`s my story I`ll make him ooc if i want to.

I will not publish anonymous negative reviews. I accept constructive criticism only.

I know some of you are Multishippers. I`m warning you in the flashback to the 90`s there will be Beth and she will not be a good person. i`m making her bad in this one...if you don`t like that you should bow out now. No hard feelings. I`m not tagging Beth for that very reason. You`ve been warned lol

Anyway if I haven`t scared you off let me know what you think:)

I do not own or profit from The Walking Dead

_CHAPTER ONE_

I'm not like them  
>But I can pretend<br>The sun is gone  
>But I have a light<br>The day is done  
>But I'm having fun<br>I think I'm dumb  
>Or maybe just happy<p>

Think I'm just happy

My heart is broke  
>But I have some glue<br>Help me inhale  
>And mend it with you<br>We'll float around  
>And hang out on clouds<br>Then we'll come down  
>And have a hangover ...<br>Have a hangover

Skin the sun  
>Fall asleep<br>Wish away  
>The soul is cheap<br>Lesson learned  
>Wish me luck<br>Soothe the burn  
>Wake me up<p>

DUMB~ Nirvana

**2014**

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"Merle, your fidgeting worse than an eight year old at the dentist. Sit your ass in your chair and shut the fuck up"

Daryl sunk down in his seat as Merle continued to flirt with the women in the chair next to him, lifting his shirt up to show the women his cardiac bypass scar muttering "I showed you mine now you show me yours sugar"

"I swear to god Merle I'm gonna leave" Daryl huffed getting more and more annoyed. They were at a CPR class for heart attack survivors, a mandatory condition for Merle's release from the hospital after his recent heart attack, Merle and his closest family member had to take a two night CPR class.

"Daryl if you don't take the class, they won't discharge me tomorrow. You know that" Merle said sounding like a petulant child.

"Believe me Merle the nurses are dying to get rid of you, that right there is an empty threat. Besides why should I have to suffer because you ruined your fucking body with booze, drugs and pussy...I mean how many times have you had the clap anyway?" Daryl said emphasizing the last part so the women seated next to Merle overheard. Her eyes widened and she turned away.

"Asshole" Merle said hitting him in the gut. "Besides...what the fuck else would you be doing, sitting home all by your lonesome, fuck Daryl you need a life and you need to get laid...bad.'

"That fucking does it I am out of here" Daryl said standing up to leave. Just then the door opened and a figure obviously the instructor tried to make it through the door balancing a pile of CPR, dummies in her arms. Daryl couldn't see her face but the first thing he noticed was her legs. Fuck she had great legs he thought as he sat down. there was something familiar about them.

Some kiss ass from the first row jumped up to help her and he heard her voice "Thank you" the voice said floating up from behind the pile of dummies. That voice, that sweet voice, he would never forget it, but it couldn't be her. Without realizing he was doing so he leaned forward as kiss ass grabbed CPR dummies one by one putting them on the table. She turned and he saw her. He could never forget that face, those eyes, they widened in surprise when she recognized him. It was Carol...his first love, fuck the love of his life, he's let her go eighteen years ago and it was the biggest mistake of his life.

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**1996**

He was utterly and completely obsessed with a girl who didn't even know his name.

Daryl watched her from across the school yard. She sat on a bench under a tree completely oblivious to the kids surrounding her. Smiling down in to that damn book she was sketching in. He was both jealous of that book and so curious about it`s contents he'd contemplated stealing it a time or two.

He knew her name; Carol Ford, but everyone called her the indie chick. She had one friend that he knew of...a girl name Andrea, and she seemed content with that. Most of the school seemed to keep their distance for different reasons.

Daryl had been watching her for three years, unsure what it was about her that attracted his attention. She was beautiful, sure, she had intense crystal clear blue eyes, and red curls that he wanted to run his hands through, and fuck her tits had kept him awake at night...But it was more than that.

She kept herself apart from everyone but Andrea, but she was still so fucking nice. She had a smile and a kind word for everyone who spoke to her whether it was the least popular or most popular kid in their school.

But then, the most popular kid in their school had never spoken to her because that was him. She occupied his thoughts, his fantasies, hell if she was in the same room he couldn't take his eyes off of her, but he hadn't spoken to her once in three years.

The guys at school had noticed her, fuck who wouldn't? They called her indie because she was just that independent, care free. She wasn't trying to look like Mariah Carey like the rest of the girls, but her wild hair reminded him of just that. She dressed the way she wanted, and didn't care if others disliked it. He groaned as she leaned forward a little. She was wearing a sleeveless plaid dress that hugged tight on her boobs then flared out right below them. He'd seen the deep v of her fucking cleavage that she was showing off this morning as he'd walked past her in the hall way and had almost face planted into an open locker.

And as usually she had on those boots, those fucking boots were part of his wet dreams. The docs with the buckles all the way up to the side. She must love them, she wore them every day.

He'd never once approached her but there was something about her that fascinated him, and he wasn't sure why. Maybe it was the fact that she seemed like she'd overcome a shitty upbringing. Her father died when she was five and her mother had become a bad alcoholic. There was gossip in town that her mother had been abusive and raging drunk.

She had an older brother,Abraham, he was 13 years older then Carol. He'd come to visit unexpectantly one night and found Carol badly injured from a beating when she was only 12 years old. Her mother and her mother's boyfriend unconscious in the next room. He'd called the cops, the next week Abe had been awarded custody of his little sister, and testified against his mother he'd never looked back when Carol's mon went to jail.

Abe Ford was a mechanic in town, big and loud he loved his little sister fiercely and Daryl had heard he was overprotective to the point of obsessiveness.

Daryl had eaten up any gossip or story about Carol, filling it away as every thing he learned made him like her even more, but he still never spoke to her.

She was everything he wasn't, where she had overcome a shitty start to life and wasn't ashamed of her past, he kept his shithole of a home life as secretive as possible. The only one who knew the truth was his best friend Rick, who as a freshman convinced him to go out for football.

He'd never played other than fooling around with Rick and Merle, his brother. But he'd had a natural talent and it got him noticed, Rick too. It was a good way to explain the bruises.

Rick had been his best friend all his life so he knew the truth, about his Dad. After his mom died,his dad had spiraled downward. He became a drunk, and a mean one at that. Taking his rage out on him and Merle, but then Merle left, leaving him alone.

His dad had been apathetic about football at first,but had come to realize the perks that having the star quarter back as a child ,gave him in town. It helped a little, the beatings became less frequent, his old man was scared of interrupting the gravy train.

Daryl wanted a scholarship so bad he could taste it, he wanted away from his dad, from this town forever. He would run and never come back.

He was quiet at school, letting Rick do the talking but tried to maintain the perfect image. Perfect grades, perfect attitude, perfect girlfriend...Beth, he hated her more and more every day, he loathed her superficiality, she was a spoiled brat. A junior, the only reason he stayed with her was she fit the image that he was trying to project, and her Dad had connections. She was the perfect girlfriend but not the perfect girl.

Carol was perfect in his eyes but didn't fit in to what he wanted. Her brother Abe's motorcycle garage was filled with loud guys, who had questionable pasts at best, hell half of them where Merle's friends.

Carol deserved better than him, someone who would treat her well, and not be scared of who he really was. Fuck if he already had his scholarship, maybe he would take a chance on talking to her, putting himself out there. But the year was only beginning, and if he didn't get his biology grade up he wouldn't be playing football at all. Mr, Horvath had pulled him aside this morning to tell him he was being assigned a student tutor, and to meet them in the the library for the first time tomorrow morning.

No Carol deserved better then him,but he been quietly stamping down any interest in her that was openly displayed by any guy at their school. Most of them had realized it was not worth his anger and stayed away from her.

"Stop staring at her stalker"

He was jolted out of his thoughts by Rick sitting down next to him. School was out for the day, he usually waited and caught a ride home with Rick. Rick knew about his fascination with Carol. He missed no chance to tease him about it, but kept it too himself for the most part.

He watched as Carol turned sideways on the bench and crossed her legs out in front of her, leaning back against the tree.

Her face, when she was sketching in that book, he dreamed about her staring at him like that. What he wouldn't give to see what was in that book.

He watched as she perked up at the sound of an approaching motorcycle. She grabbed her things, her dress fluttering around her legs. She waved at her brother and rolled her eyes when he plopped a helmet down over head. Fuck she was adorable he thought as they drove off.

"How are you going to stand it next year, when your at a different schools...who will you obsessively stare at then?" Rick asked with a grin

"Fuck off" he said punching him lightly in the shoulder.

Rick laughed then pulled something from his backpack. "Mr. Horvath asked me to give you this...said it was the info on your tutor."

He grabbed the envelop opening it and let it drop to the ground. That had to be a mistake, ...Carol couldn't be his tutor. Rick grabbed the note and laughed "well looks like your finally gonna have to talk to her. ..."

an: FYI- this story will be set in 1996 until I mark the return to 2014


	2. Chapter 2

AN; hey guys sorry for the long wait, I have real life drama and it's giving me some writers block. Just wanted to remind you...Beth is not nice in this story...if your a fan you've been warned. Also Daryl will be ooc a little in this in that he is experiencing some of the popularity he had at for example the prison in high school. at the same time trying to hide his home life but is determined to get away from it...so he's a little shallow in that he will do whatever it takes to make that happen. Anyway let me know what you think:)

I do not own or profit from The Walking Dead

**Chapter 2**

Carol hoped of the motorcycle and made it her way into the garage, a bounce in her step as she went. She and Abe lived in a small two bedroom apartment above the garage, it was the definition of a hole in the wall but she loved every square inch of it. She loved living with Abe, her brother was her hero, he'd saved her from hell all those years ago, when he brought her to live with him and he let her be who she wanted. When she'd been sad and wanted to talk about what happened he'd listened muttering "son of a dick"under his breath. When she'd wanted to be alone he'd respected that to, he was practically perfect except for one thing...

"Hey Curly!"

His silly nickname for her he refused to get rid of. She giggled and rolled her eyes turning to him. "What?"

"Make sure you get your homework done before talking to Andrea on the phone alright?" He said quirking his brow "and no staying up until one am to sketch tonight"

"Ok" she said running up to peck him on the cheek "are the guys coming up for supper tonight?" She asked as he gave her a quick hug and then messed up her hair

"If your cooking they probably will.." He said as a customer pulled in.

"Well invite them all up"she said making her way into the garage

She smiled as she heard the familiar banter of the guys working in the garage, they had all but one worked here for years. They teased her non stop but she loved them all fiercely.

"Hey Curly!"

She smiled and stopped "Hey Big Tiny...you coming up to eat tonight?" She asked at the huge man who reminded her of a gentle giant. He was about the same age as Abe and had been friends with her brother since school.

"If your cooking I am.." He said with a grin

"Ahhh she fucking cooks too...be still my beating fucking black heart"

Carol turned and grinned at Perez. He was twenty five, and loved to joke around, he came to Abe's garage straight from trade school as an apprentice. Him and his best friend Miller

"Dude...I wouldn't let Abe hear you talking to her like that...he'd fucking have your balls" Miller said nervously

"Miller do I look like a fucking moron?" Perez said pausing and staring at Miller

"Well you..." Miller started only to be interrupted by Perez

"Sweet Jesus Merciful Fuck!" Perez said rubbing the bridge of his nose "Miller how many times do I gotta fucking explain what a rhetorical question is?"

"Oh...that was a rhetorical fucking question..I thought you said that was a question you weren't supposed to answer?" Miller said confused

Carol giggle she loved watching the two of them bicker...she'd had a huge crush on both of them in the past only to realize they were too old for her. Plus Abe would lose his shit in a nuclear meltdown.

"Anyway...Curly knows I was joking" Perez said "Count us in Curly...love when you cook"

She kept walking through the garage making her way to the staircase that lead up to their apartment she could see the last two occupants of the garage. T-Dog and his new apprentice Ceasar Martinnez. T-Dog, Abe, and BigTiny had been friends since school. T-Dog was almost like a second big brother too her. Ceasar was new and somewhat...intense. He was only nineteen...and she was pretty sure he was interested in her in a romantic sense, she was flattered but unsure...he seemed nice enough though.

"Hey Sweetheart" T-Dog said when he saw her. She smiled giving him a peck on the cheek

"Hi...come on up for supper okay guys?" She said and kept walking.

"What no kiss for me?" Martinnez asked

T-Dog took his grease rag and flicked to hit Ceasar in the back of the head as she walked she heard him mutter to Ceasar "what the fuck is wrong with you? Hands off...if you don't want Abe to fuck you up"

**XxxXxxxXxxxxXxxxxx**

It didn't take her long to get her homework done. School always came easy to her,she was at the top if her class which Abe was immensely proud of and took every opportunity to brag about.

She grabbed the cordless phone dialling Andrea's number as she put some chicken in the microwave to defrost. She was making Fettuccine Alfredo, the guys would eat anything as long as she made enough to feed fifty people.

"Hey" Andrea said "What did Mr,Horvath want to talk to you about?"

Carol squirmed as if Andrea was standing right there "uhh he asked me to tutor another student"

Andrea sighed "And let me guess you said yes even though you don't really have time...didn't you?"

"Yeah"

"Who are you tutoring?" Andrea asked

Carol gulped "Daryl Dixon"

Andrea started laughing "Your Stalker!"

"He's not my stalker...I wish you wouldn't say that" Carol said

"Carol he obsessively stares at you for three years but never talks to you once and he is the most popular boy in school. Jackie told me that was why Ed Pelletier stopped calling you Daryl told him to stay away.

"Good riddance...Ed was a jerk" she said with a grimace

"I know...I'm just saying it's weird" Andrea said

Carol bit her lip she knew what Andrea was talking about, she'd noticed it herself. Daryl did stare at her a lot, but for some reason it never felt creepy. She'd thought at first maybe he was into her but he'd never made a move. He'd started dating Beth Greene instead.

"Oh God are you gonna be forced to listen to Redneck love poetry about the Jesus Barbie?" Andrea groaned out suddenly

Carol giggled "No I'm tutoring him in biology"

"Ode to the fucking birds and the bees and Beth's swollen knees" Andrea said in an impression of Daryl's voice.

**Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

"Your bleeding"

Daryl turned to Rick who was standing at his locker looking at him in concern staring at the drops that were trickling down his back from underneath his black hoodie hitting the floor.

"Fuck Daryl let me tell my dad he would help you..." Rick started

"No...it's fine...just a bad night...gotta go to tutoring" he muttered his stomach a jumble at the thought of seeing Carol.

Rick sighed and grabbed a dark blue hoody from his locker "Here for you to change into when you stop bleeding"

"Thanks Man" he said

"Hi Baaaaaaby"

Daryl grimaced at the voice behind him; Beth, it was like nails on a chalkboard to him. He'd been hoping that he could avoid her by coming to school early...no such luck.

"Hey" he said to her. She was wearing a white cardigan that showed off her midriff, and skintight jeans. He was sure she thought she looked cute, personally he thought she looked like a skank.

She gave him a quick hug and he flinched, fuck he wasn't sure how much longer he could do this no matter how much help her father might be in getting him into a good school.

He wanted out of this town and more importantly away from his dad. Nights like last night were bad...his dad had been drunk and lost control, beating him so badly with his belt the welts were still bleeding. He had to get away from him.

"Oh heck Daryl...your bleeding! I got it all over my white shirt! A little warning next time? Jeepers...now I have to go home and change!" Beth said dramatically pecking him on the cheek and walking off

Yeah the sooner he got away from this town the better.


	3. Chapter 3

AN: hey sorry so long in between updates for this. Let me know what you think :)

I do not own or profit from The Walking Dead

**Chapter 3**

She was late.

Well, he thought as he looked at his watch, he was early. He'd wanted to get out of the house this morning before seeing his dad. Last night had been bad.

Before his mom had died his dad had been heading towards a drinking problem but not quite there yet. He still managed to keep his job at the mill which had placed them solidly in middle class.

When his mom died, his dad had received some kind of promotion to a low level management position. He sat in an office all day and Daryl was pretty sure he got shit face drunk everyday. Last night had been worse than usually when he got home. He'd been mad about something and that usually meant that Daryl would pay the price.

He was getting bigger because of football, packing on muscle, but his dad was still bigger than him. He'd tried fighting back but it usually made things much worse...so much worse he thought flinching in his chair.

His stomach cramped at the thought of actually talking to Carol. He'd thought about talking to Mr, Horvath and asking him to switch his tutor, but then he realized this might be just what he needed to get over his little obsession. She couldn't be as amazing as he'd built her up to be in his mind.

The door to the library opened and he saw her head peek in. She saw him and she smiled. His breath caught in his throat, he'd seen her smile before but never directly at him.

She was wearing a dress again. He liked the fact that she seemed to wear what she wanted and buck what everyone else thought or wore, and loved the fact that the dresses she seemed to favor always showed off legs. Her riotous curls were pushed away from her face and he was struck by how blue her eyes were when she sat down next to him.

"Daryl right?" She said

He nodded at her unable to speak for a moment as he flushed brightly.

"Well I'm Carol...it's nice to meet you. Sorry I'm" she glanced at her watch "exactly on time" she said grinning at him in confusion.

He loved her voice, he'd heard it at a distance but up close it was even better. Soft, sweet but strong. Fuck he would sit there all day and just listen to her read the textbook. He realized then she was looking at him expectantly, waiting for him to talk.

"I'm used...to getting up early."he said quietly.

"Ahhh, well not me. My brother calls me the snooze queen. I roll out of bed at the very last minute and I'm grumpy as can be, like right now I'm totally bitchy cause I haven't eaten" she said with a grin.

He snorted "ya don't seem to bitchy."

She laughed "aww your sweet, I like you already...but I'm only acting nice cause I know that I have food." She said rumbling in her large pack.

"I hope you don't mind, you probably already had breakfast but I hate eating by myself, so I brought you some too." She said as she pulled a couple of apples, cheese strings, muffins and a couple of bottles of apple juice. His stomach growled, he hadn't eaten this morning he'd been just happy to get out of the house. Happy that he'd been able to get out of bed in minimal pain.

His back was on fire, he wasn't sure how in the world he was going to get through the day and practice after school at this rate.

She opened the book as she ate happily. That was another difference between her and Beth. Beth constantly obsessed over weight, barely eating it seemed enough to sustain life. He often wondered how Beth had enough energy to keep running her mouth which never shut up.

Carol was happily eating as she began speaking "Well I thought it would be best to just go back to the beginning of the year and review everything...you'll need to do that for the final anyway." She asked popping a second muffin in her mouth. "Please eat...seriously I hate eating by myself" she said

He nodded and picked up an apple a flutter in his stomach at the beautiful smile that crossed her face.

They worked for awhile and he began to understand why Mr, Horvath had asked her to tutor him. She had a way of explaining things like she understood the way he was thinking, the trouble he'd been having.

She smelled amazing, he wanted to put his head in her neck and inhale. He wanted to commit it to memory so he could remember it tonight when he was trying to block out his dad and actually get some sleep.

She excitedly touched his arm when he answered a question right, her eyes were beaming with pride at him. He blushed and lowered his head and that's when he saw her look at her fingers.

"Is that blood?" She asked rubbing her thumb along her fingers and looking at him in concern.

"It's nothing" he shrugged getting his stuff together ready to bolt.

She grabbed his wrist stopping him

"No...please wait...are you hurt?" She asked with obvious concern, her eyes were wide and expressive. She looked about ready to cry.

"Naw...I'm fine" he said avoiding eye contact.

"Are you sure? Did something happen?" She asked

"Got into a fight with my brother...last night s'all" he mumbled praying she would stop the line of questioning. Merle wasn't even home last night, but that sounded a hell of a lot better than my dad kicked the shit out of me.

"And your still bleeding? Daryl...you might need stitches. We should go to the nurse's office." She said worry in her voice.

"I'm alright" he said softly looking up at her eyes, silently begging her to drop it.

She dropped his hand slow, an understanding expression crossing her face. She had almost tender expression on her face, like she wanted to comfort him, but was holding herself back. They settled that they would meet every second morning in the library before he made his exit, his escape from her eyes. He felt exposed, she understood.

XxxxxxxXxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

He'd skipped first period, to shower in the locker room. No one would be there then. He had his jeans back on was dabbing at his back with a towel when the door opened.

Rick walked in carrying the teams first aid kit. "Figured I'd find you here" Rick said shaking his head opening the kit. "Just tell the team we were fooling around on my little brothers skateboard and you have road rash from falling..." He said applying bandages to his back. "This is really bad Daryl...he is only going to get worse, you need to tell someone."

"No...you ever hear of some abused foster kid getting a full ride scholarship? I just gotta get out of here...and I won't look back." He said

Rick sighed "How was tutoring...You kidnap her and tie her up in your room yet?." He asked with a chuckle.

Daryl snorted "Fuck off" he said throwing his towel at him.

XxxxxxxxxxxXxxxxxxxxxxXxxxxxz

"So how did it go? Did he make you want impale yourself on your pencil?"

Carol snorted at Andrea who was currently on speaker phone, as she sketched.

"He wasn't that bad...he was nice actually...shy. He's really shy." She said.

"Pfft...I doubt it, he seems more full of himself than anything else" Andrea huffed.

"No...no I don't think so..." She said thoughtfully.

"Well explain Jesus Barbie then?" Andrea said

She was thoughtful for a moment. There was something about Daryl that drew her in, something in his eyes that had seemed so familiar to her. For some reason she felt like they were alike, they were the same.

Then she touched his sleeve and felt the blood, and she knew. She could have flashed back to herself four years ago trying to fade away, trying not to be noticed until Abe had saved her. He brushed it off as a fight with his brother, but she knew it wasn't the truth. The sad thing was he was trying to keep up appearances and all eyes were on him.

She sighed softly looking down at his face staring up at her from her sketch pad. His eyes seemed to follow her and they were filled with a pain that she definitely understood.


End file.
